Pottstown, PA Sonic!

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Turbo visits Pottstown

By June Hood of the Times’ staff

Published Thursday, March 27, 2008

Presidential Candidate Huricane Akara Turbofire has finished his speech at the new Pottstown Sonic Drive-In. He is now heading to Reading to do a reading about leading.

Mr. Turbofire, who was introduced by both a human dressed as a Route 44 drink and one dressed as a hot dog, stood on a Sonic picnic table at about 1 p.m. The parking lot was filled with admiring human and canine supporters.

"Humans say that all elections are about the future," Mr. Turbofire noted. “This is certainly true, as you cannot go back in time and vote.”

The audience cheered when Mr. Turbofire said, "You may have noticed that unlike a certain human who is also visiting your city today, I did not block off streets prior to my visit, nor did I require that humans and animals be at all inconvenienced by my trip here. That is what government should be like!"

Mr. Turbofire mentioned the importance of finding a new, clean energy source, saying that poop burning technologies should not be ignored.

Mr. Turbofire concluded his speech with his now trademarked request for everyone to join him for cheese and bacon, but then he paused and said “and ice cream!”

At the conclusion of the speech, many supporters were lucky enough to shake his paw as he made his way to the ice cream machine.